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by arrowsanonymous



Category: The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Multi, Not Beta Read, Other, chatfic, i don't know?? how do i tag, mildly nsfw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:35:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25481737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrowsanonymous/pseuds/arrowsanonymous
Summary: chat/textfic centered exclusively around Camp Jupiter characters. lots of weird shit in here.yes i re read ToA and HoO for this, yes i pirated CJ confidential for this, yes i'm using only names mentioned in passing as actual characters. <3
Relationships: Jason Grace & Hazel Levesque, Jason Grace/Percy Jackson, Lavinia Asimov/Marilyn, Lavinia Asimov/Poison Oak, Nico di Angelo & Hazel Levesque
Comments: 9
Kudos: 33





	1. one

_ laviniaa made a groupchat! _

_ laviniaa changed the name of the groupchat to cool kids only! _

_ laviniaa added reynaara, savingrace, gwendolyn’t, bobby pin, octavian is cool, hazelnut, nico nico nii, jacob, koolaidstan, and yourlocalhealer! _

**laviniaa** hello folks

**laviniaa** welcome to the cool kids club

**hazelnut** why is oct*vian here and not ida, leila, marilyn, carl, reza, lynda, claudia, janice, larry, or michael for that matter

**octavian is cool** everyone you just mentioned is absolutely shit

**hazelnut** ok say goodbye to your food, fucker

**hazelnut** reza is dating an aurae

**hazelnut** you’re dead

**octavian is cool** they can’t fuck with my food, without me this camp would collapse

**octavian is cool** I’m the only one who has prophetic powers ❤️

**reynaara** Are we absolutely sure you’re not a liar?

**octavian is cool** yes we are? bitch

**savingrace** i mean as much as i hate him

**savingrace** it’s real i’ve seen it first hand

**gwendolyn’t** yeah no fuck him still lmao

**gwendolyn’t** jk octavian always hooks me up with the best caps ever

**gwendolyn’t** ily

**octavian is cool** :)

**nico nico nii** what is a caps

**hazelnut** same question actually

**octavian is cool** oh you sweet summer children

**octavian is cool** >:)

**reynaara** No.

_ reynaara has removed octavian is cool from cool kids only! _

**laviniaa** i’m back

**laviniaa** UM

**laviniaa** I WAS GONE FOR TWO MINUTES?? HOW DID OCTAVIAN ALREADY GET KICKED

**laviniaa** with all due respect, i left for two minutes to get my drink and i come back to this 😭 pls

**savingrace** reyna just doesnt want drugs to be discussed here ig?? it makes sense because there are literal 13 year olds in here

**hazelnut** the fuck do you mean drugs 😭

**koolaidstan** did someone say drugs??

**laviniaa** dakota no

**gwendolyn’t** dakota no!! you have to stay sober!!

**gwendolyn’t** koolaid only

**savingrace** yeah dakota you’re already addicted to that. imagine if you’re addicted to drugs

**hazelnut** uh can we not change the topic here thanks ❤️

**savingrace** hazel u fucking sound like octopus

**hazelnut** OCTOPUS??

**hazelnut** gods that’s terrible i’ll go get some to make up for it

**nico nico nii** get some what??

**nico nico nii** also drugs like,, paracetamol and stuff?

**laviniaa** oop-

**laviniaa** do u fr not know

**laviniaa** isnt ur job to go to the shadiest places on earth for pluto

**koolaidstan** oh gods

**gwendolyn’t** UM

_ gwendolyn’t added isabelaaaa, marilyn’t, thisisleila, cloudia, and rezanine! _

**gwendolyn’t** hi!!

**laviniaa** MARI!!!

**isabelaaaa** hey.

**marilyn’t** omg hi gwen and lavinia <3!

**marilyn’t** wHY IS PRAETOR REYNA HERE

**rezanine** wat is dis 

**laviniaa** a group chat??

**rezanine** yeah ok

**nico nico nii** gwen did you just,, change the subject

**gwendolyn’t** no? i invited the cool kids hazel mentioned

**nico nico nii** ok what is a caps

**nico nico nii** i will google it if you don’t tell me

**gwendolyn’t** it’s,,,

**koolaidstan** it’s mdma

**koolaidstan** gwen you’re usually not this much of a coward??

**gwendolyn’t** OK BUT IT’S NICO

**nico nico nii** i am right here

**nico nico nii** oh! narcotics

**isabelaaaa** wait, are you telling me that nico di angelo doesn’t know what drugs are?

**nico nico nii** i am from the 1940s isa

**nico nico nii** all i know is hide from bomb, be quiet, eat hot chip and lie

**isabelaaaa** what.

**isabelaaaa** i have to go, but i demand an explanation later.

**nico nico nii** yes

**nico nico nii** can someone add carl and larry here

**nico nico nii** i wanna bully them

**marilyn’t** nICO

**marilyn’t** no bullying :(

**nico nico nii** but

**reynaara** Why are you still here? We have war games in five minutes.

**nico nico nii** my ankle is broken ma’am

**reynaara** Please refrain from calling me ma’am.

**reynaara** Nico, you’ve been excused. Marilyn, get to the field now.

**marilyn’t** oops sorry yes reyna

**marilyn’t** omw

  
**reynaara** Alright.


	2. two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lavinia gets her first period. everyone mysteriously disappears. hazel is confused

_we are in lesbians_

**laviniaa** Y’ALL IS WAR GAMES FR STARTING

**isabelaaaa** yes.

**isabelaaaa** where are you?

**laviniaa** BLEEDING ALL OVER MY FUCKING LEOTARD??

**hazelnut** what

**isabelaaaa** um.

**laviniaa** you heard me??

**gwendolyn’t** ?? are you injured

**gwendolyn’t** you’re not on sentry duty tho

**laviniaa** nO I GOT MY PERIOD

**laviniaa** i mean i think it’s my period

**gwendolyn’t** your first??

**laviniaa** yes?????

**laviniaa** im 14 😭 i dont deserve this

**marilyn’t** oh no bby :( im so sorry 

**marilyn’t** can you still make it to the games?

**marilyn’t** if not i’ll tell reyna! she’ll understand 💞

**isabelaaaa** no need. i already told reyna. 

**isabelaaaa** marilyn, she also gave the clear for one of us to go help lavinia.

**laviniaa** im in the shower rn but please send help 

**laviniaa** and boba tea?? fuck im craving boba tea

**marilyn’t** ofc b, i’ll be there in 10

  
  


* * *

  
  


_ nico nico nii made a groupchat! _

_ nico nico nii added hazelnut and cloudia! _

_ nico nico nii changed the name of the groupchat to children! _

**nico nico nii** hi ik war games arent starting yet

**hazelnut** excuse?? i am not a child

**cloudia** hazel

**cloudia** embrace the baby

**nico nico nii** claudia is right. we r all under 15. people think we’re precious

**nico nico nii** this is

**nico nico nii** a clear advantage

**cloudia** :3

**hazelnut** smh okay

**hazelnut** claudia why are you not in line

**hazelnut** literally half of the 5th cohort is gone??

**cloudia** im digging trenches rn

**cloudia** reyna s gonna buy some time for us bc lynda wont shut the fuck up

**cloudia** so we have one more to dig

**nico nico nii** again??

**nico nico nii** didn’t you get trench duty last month

**cloudia** well i mean yeah

**hazelnut** go clean up and join the ranks

**hazelnut** i’ll handle that one

**cloudia** oh thank mercury

**cloudia** you re the best hazel

**cloudia** also add janice in here? 🥺

**nico nico nii** i will, now go

**cloudia** yes i’m going i’m ging

**nico nico nii** ging

**cloudia** fUCK OFF

_ nico nico nii added janusice! _

  
  


* * *

  
  


**_savingrace is now direct messaging frank!_ **

**savingrace** Frank

**savingrace** do you know where half of your cohort went

**savingrace** no one is answering their phones

**frank** um

**frank** no, I don’t know where everyone went, Praetor

**frank** Hazel is also trying to contact everyone

**frank** though I think Marilyn left? not really sure why

**savingrace** oh, yeah, Lavinia has some issues. Marilyn has asked Reyna for permission to help her

**savingrace** thank you for the information

**frank** of course, I’m glad I can help

**frank** um

**frank** Praetor, why are we being told to,,, sit down??

**savingrace** just call me Jason it’s fine

**savingrace** i think war games is cancelled

**savingrace** i don’t know if i can reveal more?

**savingrace** Reyna will probably explain in a minute

**frank** thank you for the answer, Jason

**savingrace** ofc

  
  


* * *

_ we are in lesbians _

**hazelnut** REYNA JUST TOLD US TO SIT DOWN??

**hazelnut** THIS ISN’T MILITARY PROTOCOL I’M SCARED

**hazelnut** GWEN?? WHERE THE FUCK IS THE REST OF THE 5TH COHORT??

**gwendolyn’t** I’m Using The Voice To Uh Uh Text Feature So Sorry If It Makes Nom Crepes

**hazelnut** what

**gwendolyn’t** Yes I Can’t Ripe Arr N So I Have Toon Do Dishes

**gwendolyn’t** Isaiah Can You Eggs, Plain

**isabelaaaa** hi.

**isabelaaaa** we’re all pretty busy rn.

**isabelaaaa** reza is here too, there’s a lot missing from every cohort. you’ll be fine.

**hazelnut** i

**hazelnut** ok but there better be a good fuckin explanation for this

**hazelnut** gotta go dig trenches, see u soon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do i look like i know what i'm doing


	3. three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bellona wydddd

**_reynaara is now direct messaging savingrace!_ **

  
  


**reynaara** jason

 **reynaara** are you absolutely positive this is a good idea

**savingrace** i mean no but it’s funny

**reynaara** jason.

**savingrace** it doesn’t break any rules or traditions except for the war games

 **savingrace** it should be funny

 **savingrace** and most the fifth cohort knows about it and a lot of other cohort’s kids also know

 **savingrace** it’s fine

**reynaara** oh and octavian knows

**savingrace** EXCUSE??

**reynaara** yes

 **reynaara** did you not tell him?? smh

**savingrace** no?? i wanted to prank him too

**reynaara** yeah no he’d sulk for ages and be virtually useless

 **reynaara** and i can’t have that, jason, we need our augur harmless

**savingrace** :(

 **savingrace** 💔 i will add him

_savingrace added octavian is cool!_

_savingrace changed the name of the groupchat to cool people & octavian! _

**octavian is cool** the fuck is this

**savingrace** yes

**reynaara** the explanation as to why i made everyone sit down and why half of the 5th cohort is gone

**octavian is cool** stop stalling

 **octavian is cool** I would like to know why you treated our war games like a joke

**reynaara** you’re a joke

**savingrace** that’s why we treat you like one

 **savingrace** there’s a visiting god

**reynaara** a god is visiting

 **reynaara** JASON 🔫

**octavian is cool** so my reading was right??

 **octavian is cool** you lied to me

 **octavian is cool** I SPENT SO MUCH MONEY ON TEDDY BEARS AND I WASTED ALL OF THEM??

 **octavian is cool** fuck you??

**reynaara** we’ll fund you again ffs

**savingrace** besides, the god asked us to keep their planned arrival a secret

 **savingrace** praetor only

**octavian is cool** that’s not how roman positions work

**savingrace** you’d know

**octavian is cool** FUCK THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT

 **octavian is cool** ASSHOLE

**savingrace** oh yeah that’s your favorite place to get absolutely rawed in

**reynaara** can u people like be serious for once

**octavian is cool** I WASTED $100 DOLLARS ON STUFFED ANIMALS

 **octavian is cool** FUCK YOU AND YOUR “SERIOUS”

**reynaara** i dont care if you got offended bc you keep on missing the orgies and jason is making fun of that

 **reynaara** this is Bellona who’s visiting

**savingrace** oh yeah that reminds me WHY THE FUCK ARE WE SITTING DOWN

 **savingrace** you never told me why

 **savingrace** isn’t she like the battle goddess? doesn’t like weakness and all that?

 **savingrace** like, Lupa vibes

**octavian is cool** you’re such a dumb bitch

**reynaara** jason i value you a lot but you’re an idiot

 **reynaara** Bellona’s here to give a seminar

**savingrace** yea but like isn’t she gonna test our physical strength or sumn by making us stand

 **savingrace** and that doesn’t answer why the fifth cohort just magically disappeared like the smurfs in the second smurf movie

 **savingrace** i’ve said the word fifth cohort so much it has no meaning anymore

**reynaara** oh for fucks sake

 **reynaara** grace Bellona’s not Mars she’s quite similar to Minerva

 **reynaara** and Athena

**octavian is cool** why did u say her less cool greek name

 **octavian is cool** didnt the greek forms die

**reynaara** no u dunce

 **reynaara** you’re supposed to be smarter than this??

**savingrace** ok let’s just say the greek forms exist

 **savingrace** how would i know what athena is like

**reynaara** well then ig you’re about to find out

**octavian is cool**??? is she here already

**reynaara** in a few mins she will be

 **reynaara** put away ur phones

**savingrace** wait what about the 5th cohort??

  
  


* * *

_presentation squad_

**rezanine** u guys got th projectors rite

 **rezanine** all,, uhhh,,, 6 of em

**isabelaaaa** yes, reza. we have all the LCD projectors.

**gwendolyn’t** But We Are Miss Target Two Sixty Of The Scrimps

**rezanine** wat

**cloudia** hi , hazel just got me free from trench digging, i’m running there w the rest of the slideshow screens

 **cloudia** gwen ?? i ??

**isabelaaaa** for Luna’s sake, gwen, stop using voice to text.

 **isabelaaaa** it’s fucking incomprehensible.

**rezanine** ya ^^

**gwendolyn’t** ugh, fine

 **gwendolyn’t** i was untangling cords. didnt have a free hand

 **gwendolyn’t** & we can’t lose time but now dakota and carl are loading them to the cart so ig i get to catch a break

**rezanine** lit

 **rezanine** u were missing two of th screens right

 **rezanine** dk what theyre called

**gwendolyn’t** arent u,,, the fucking,,, tech expert,,,

**rezanine** i cn use both keynote nd microsoft powerpoint

 **rezanine** thts all i can do rly

**isabelaaaa** gods, this camp is hopeless.

**koolaidstan** bruh

 **koolaidstan** we both run it??

**isabelaaaa** yes, which further proves my point.

**gwendolyn’t** ffs stop being such a cynic

 **gwendolyn’t** its literally just screens

**carl bot** we loaded the equipment should we just hurry there or

**koolaidstan** pls no

 **koolaidstan** id like one second to catch my breath thanks

**gwendolyn’t** seconded

**rezanine** :/ we rly cnt waste time

 **rezanine** Bellona’s gna kick our collective asses if we’re late

**carl bot** i see ur point and i raise you Bellona’s not gonna be happy if her presentation team collapsed out of sheer exhaustion in the middle of transporting all of her equipment there

**isabelaaaa** remind me why we’re this tired again?

**carl bot** because a genius decided to get us blackout drunk two days ago and now most of us are still hungover

 **carl bot** great job lavinia

**rezanine** smh

**gwendolyn’t** hey be nice >:( 🔫

 **gwendolyn’t** she’s going through a lot

**carl bot** oh?

**isabelaaaa** first period blackout exhaustion marilyn fussing over her. is that enough?

**carl bot** oh

 **carl bot** i mean yeah i guess anyway i think we should get going

**rezanine** also who th fuck’s isabelaaaa

**koolaidstan** centurion of the second cohort,,?

**rezanine** no thts ida

**isabelaaaa** oh, yes, lmao, people keep on typing my name as isa instead of ida.

 **isabelaaaa** i thought i might as well make it a joke.

 **isabelaaaa** besides, it’s an easy typo to make, as d and s are right next to each other on the keyboard.

**cloudia** DUDE

 **cloudia** I M BEING TOLD TO RUN RIGHT TO THE FIELD

 **cloudia** BELLONA S HERE

 **cloudia** WHERE THE FUVK ARE YOU GUYS

 **cloudia** FUCK**

**koolaidstan** OH SHIT

 **koolaidstan** SEE I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD GET GOING 

**koolaidstan** MOVE

  
  


* * *

  
  


_we are in lesbians_

**marilyn’t** y’all 🥺🥺🥺 lavinia’s so pretty 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

**gwendolyn’t** oh??? 👀

**isabelaaaa** gwen, for Luna’s sake, fucking focus on **running**.

**marilyn’t**

****

**marilyn’t** LOOK 🥺🥺🥺

 **marilyn’t** wait,, wdym running

 **marilyn’t** guys??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> art by yours truly
> 
> no stealing bitches


	4. four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i'm researching roman holidays and stuff to justify this chapter. yes this chapter is nsfw. that mature warning is there for a reason

_ cool people & octavian _

**octavian is cool** where the fuck is the rest of the 5th cohort the fuck

**octavian is cool** Bellona is literally here we’re gonna all fucking die

**reynaara** they’re on their way here jesus fucking fuck

**reynaara** also holy shit im so sick of seeing the word cool everywhere

_ reynaara changed the name of the groupchat to important people & octavian! _

**octavian is cool** christ that’s even worse

**reynaara** change ur name and maybe i’ll consider making it something reasonable

**octavian is cool** 💔💔💔 but i dont know what to change it to

**reynaara** like fucking  _ OCTAVIAN  _ maybe

**octavian is cool** but i wanna be quirky 💔

**reynaara** octavian is cool is the furthest fucking thing from a quirky username

**reynaara** like even gwen’s user is better than that

**octavian is cool** you wound me

**octavian is cool** okay okay smh

_ octavian is cool changed their username to octavian is important! _

**reynaara** gods you’re such an attention whore

**octavian is important** 💔 knife yourself

**reynaara** i will if u do it for me

**octavian is important** what

**reynaara** what

  
  


* * *

_ children _

**cloudia** SHIT YOU G IYS IS BELLONA ALREADY THE RE

**hazelnut** is who already there?????

**hazelnut** like the  _ goddess??? _

**cloudia** YES

**cloudia** ARE YOU STILL DI GHING THRENC GES

**cloudia** I’M SORTY IM RU NM I NG RIGHT NMOW

**nico nico nii** what the fuck’s going on

**nico nico nii** oh you’re part of the presentation squad

**nico nico nii** arent y’all supposed to alert me so i can shadow travel you people

**cloudia** WHAT

**cloudia** SAY THIS IN THE GROUPCHAT??

**nico nico nii** which 

**nico nico nii** wait i found it

**hazelnut** NICO?? EXPLAIN??

**nico nico nii** later sorry hazel

  
  


* * *

_ presentation squad _

**nico nico nii** fucking idiots all of you

**nico nico nii** wya

**isabelaaaa** halfway to the field.

**isabelaaaa** i should change my name.

_ isabelaaaa changed their username to ida! _

**reynaara** WHERE IN THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOU GUYS

**reynaara** BELLONA’S NOT GOING TO BE HAPPY

**nico nico nii** I’M SHADOWTRAVELING THERE FOR PLUTO’S SAKE

**gwendolyn’t** REYNA?? IS THAT YOU??

**reynaara** YES

**reynaara** AND I’M PANICKING SO DON’T EVEN TRY

**nico nico nii** pay attention you idiots we don’t want to leave anything behind

**nico nico nii** or anyone

**reynaara** PLEASE JUST HURRY

  
  


* * *

_ Camp Jupiter _

**rezanine** is he,, fuckin ded

**larried** what the fuck happened to di angelo…

**larried** did he just fucking faint

**reynaara** Yes, he did. Medics, please tend to his re-fractured ankle. Give him the usual.

**yourlocalhealer** yes ma’am I’m on the way

**reynaara** _ Please  _ refrain from calling me ma’am,

**octavian is important** oh for fuck’s sake, reyna, accept it

**octavian is important** can someone help pranjal carry di angelo

**hazelnut** i’ll do it

**reynaara** Hazel, stay. Why are you covered in dirt? 

**gwendolyn’t** ok i’ll carry nico pranjal let’s go

**hazelnut** um

**hazelnut** trench duty,,?

**reynaara** No one was assigned trench duty due to the lack of today’s war games.

**hazelnut** but claudia??

**reynaara** Claudia?

**reynaara** Just... go wash your armor and face.

**hazelnut** yes praetor

**marilyn’t** praetor, would it be alright if i stayed behind with lavinia or would i be required to attend the seminar?

**reynaara** You can stay with her, but make sure it’s only the two of you.

**marilyn’t** yes, praetor. thank you

**reynaara** Of course.

**reynaara** Dakota, Carl, Ida, Reza, I want all of you to stand by as technicians.

**rezanine** order received, we’re going to set up the devices now.

  
  


* * *

  
  


_ presentation squad _

**gwendolyn’t** where’s ida

**carl bot** we’re the ones who are responsible to set up Bellona’s stuff so basically like IT people but i’m pretty sure it’s gonna get rotated because Bellona’s seminar may be quite long

**gwendolyn’t** no!!

**gwendolyn’t** did you just forget our plans for after setting up the tech

**carl bot** ...yes?

**ida** this fucker, i swear.

**ida** they were going to have an orgy in the baths.

**carl bot** but the seminar Bellona is going to need us to run some of the things

**koolaidstan** it’s fine even jason and octavian is joining

**carl bot** WHAT

**carl bot** do none of you have a sense of duty i’m losing it why is the augur and one of the praetors escaping a god’s seminar isn’t she going to smite us

**koolaidstan** smh are you in or not

**carl bot** well i mean yes but

**koolaidstan** alright ill add you to the gc

  
  


* * *

_  
oworgy _

_ koolaidstan added carl bot! _

**carl bot** oworgy??

**gwendolyn’t** yes

**savingrace** why are there so many people in here

**savingrace** last minute additions too

**gwendolyn’t** it’s not an orgy without at least six people

**octavian is important** ok but how many people are in here

**ida** jason, octavian, gwen, dakota, ida, carl, leila, larry.

**ida** not a lot, basically.

**gwendolyn’t** i mean

**gwendolyn’t** this is like… a mini orgy

**carl bot** hang on hang on hang on how old is everyone here for legal purposes

**gwendolyn’t** i’m 17, octavian is 17, jason is 16, ida is 17, carl is 16, larry is 18, leila is 17.

**gwendolyn’t** we’re not gonna add in like 14 year olds in here lmao we’re not that horrible

**carl bot** at least you have morals i guess

**carl bot** also how is Bellona not going to smite us like the praetor centurions and the IT people skipping her seminar

**ida** fr, who cares about that?

**ida** what’s important is that we have fun.

**carl bot** well i care i dont want to die

**savingrace** she won’t kill you i’m pretty sure

**savingrace** besides, if she doesn’t notice that we’re gone, we’re technically not breaking rules..

**savingrace** Reyna confirmed that it was alright anyway

**carl bot** reyna WHAT

**ida** chill.

**octavian is important** didn’t you explain to carl what’s going on? lmao

**carl bot** yes pls explain

**octavian is important** no ❤️

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please help i don't know what i'm doing


	5. five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uh oh shit gets wilder

_ children _

**unicorn** the fuck happened

**unicorn** all i know is that i woke up in the infirmary with my ankle broken again and the realization that my life is a lie

**hazelnut** what

**cloudia** what

**unicorn** yes

**unicorn** apparently my name is supposed to be spelt d’angelo not di angelo

**cloudia** but you were passed out in the infirmary how did you find out about this

**hazelnut** nico what happened

**unicorn** i think my memories are coming back

**cloudia** you have amnesia ??

**cloudia** how did i not know this

**unicorn** no i got dipped in the lethe

**unicorn** just.

**unicorn** just a little dip

**cloudia** WHAT

**unicorn** yeah

**cloudia** nico ,,, how are you ,, feeling

**unicorn** i’ve never been asked that question

**unicorn** not in so lomg

**unicorn** now that i think of it i didn’t have a childhood and percy hates me and i was taught that gay people were horrible and conversion therapy and shit and 

**unicorn** i don’t know i don’t wanr my memories back i just cant deal ith it ive been keeping them away for years i dont want to remember them im thinking of going to the lethe again so that i dont have to remember them

**cloudia** that’s … horrible , i’m so sorry

**unicorn** dont be 

**unicorn** i’m just complaining hades wiped my memory for my safety and im here beingannoying about it

**hazelnut** nico. listen. you helped me deal with my blackouts in a healthy way. i will help you with your memories

**hazelnut** whether you like it or not

**unicorn** no ❤️

**hazelnut** nico.

**hazelnut** you can’t just deny what’s happened

**unicorn** how bout i do it anyway

**hazelnut** nico, please, listen to me

**hazelnut** i know it’s scary

**hazelnut** but if you do anything rash it’ll be more harmful in the long run

**unicorn** whatever makes it stop ill do it

**unicorn** don’t contact me

  
  


* * *

_ important people & octavian _

**octavian is important** reyna what the fuck is happening hello

**reynaara** aprils fools

**octavian is important** HUH

**octavian is important** April’s fools?? Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano?? explain??

**reynaara** gods i hate my full name 💔

**reynaara** yea its not Bellona visiting lol i told the presentation squad last minute it’s actually the goddess of humor (Hilaritas) & she wanted to prank the whole camp

**reynaara** her curses are pretty scary & also shes a wholeass goddess so i complied

**octavian is important** bitch

**octavian is important** so that’s why we can do the orgy??

**savingrace** yes.

**savingrace** btw i think one of us left the olive oil behind?? or was it the strawberry lube

**reynaara** for fuck’s sake, keep this to your orgy group chat.

**octavian is important** ok adult virgin 💔

  
  


* * *

_ we are in lesbians _

**gwendolyn’t** guys

**gwendolyn’t** i think we should just ditch this thing, we’re in on the joke anyways

**gwendolyn’t** let’s go to the new rome walmart and buy the entire menstrual products aisle

**marilyn’t** i’m in

**marilyn’t** oh also boba tea??

**ida** i’ve got that covered.

**ida**

**marilyn’t** you look cute,, 🥺🥺🥺

**ida** thanks.

**ida** i’ll put this in jason’s refrigerator, then i’ll have to go. important business. sorry i can’t join in the raid.

**gwendolyn’t** smh i cant make it either

**gwendolyn’t** give us uhhh two hours, give or take?

**marilyn’t** sounds good! lmk when you’re done 

**hazelnut** yeah i have no idea what’s going on i’m gonna make some chicken soup in jason’s house i guess it takes like two hours to make anyway

**marilyn’t** can i help?? sounds fun,,

**hazelnut** sure!!

**marilyn’t** hell yea!! do you want me to pick up anything?

**hazelnut** well jason’s a whiteass boy so i’ll need some actual spices

**hazelnut** and some… i don’t know, vegetables?

**marilyn’t** LMAO YOU REALLY CAME @ JASON LIKE THAT

**marilyn’t** aight then i’ll be there in 15

  
  


* * *

_ Camp Jupiter _

**frank** What’s happening??

**clarissa** :/

**clarissa** fr whats happening

**clarissa** wheres the war games

**larried** idk it’ll prolly fucking start soon…. smh

**yourlocalhealer** well I’m not sure what’s going on right now, but Nico just shadow travelled away. I’m rather concerned for him, but I’m sure he knows what he’s doing

**hazelnut** HE WHAT

**hazelnut** HE SHADOW TRAVELLED AWAY??

**cloudia** wasn’t he ,., fucking fading

**yourlocalhealer** I was taking more of the water-unicorn horn shaving mixture we made, and when I returned, he was gone. we can try and search for him, but he’s an ambassador for Pluto…

**cloudia** god that fucking bitch

**cloudia** when he comes back i’m murdering him

**reynaavila** Language.

**reynaavila** We can’t force him to come back. 

**cloudia** ??? REYNA WITH ALL DUE RESPECT NICO HAS FUCKING A BROKEN ANKLE AND HE’S AN INCH AWAY FROM FADING ???

**reynaavila** Yes, I understand your distress, Claudia. However, I’m asking you to watch your language once again.

**cloudia** no u dont understand jack shit

**cloudia** ill dm you

**hazelnut** claudia i

**hazelnut** be careful

  
  


* * *

**_cloudia is now direct messaging reynaara!_ **

  
  


**cloudia** nico had a fucking mental breakdown ok i dont care if youre going to throw me into the tiber i do not praetor with all due respect i do not care

**cloudia** let me just copy paste what he said

**cloudia** > now that i think of it i didn’t have a childhood and percy hates me and i was taught that gay people were horrible and conversion therapy and shit and i don’t know i don’t wanr my memories back i just cant deal ith it ive been keeping them away for years i dont want to remember them im thinking of going to the lethe again so that i dont have to remember them

**cloudia** SEE WHAT I MEAN

**reynaara** wait

**reynaara** Percy?

**reynaara** I recognize that name…

**cloudia** ???

**reynaara** I think your panic is justified now, Claudia.

**reynaara** I’ll be sending a search team.

**cloudia** i’m in

**reynaara** I’m not sure

**cloudia** nico is my friend

**cloudia** besides this is gonna be a quest right

**reynaara** what do you mean?

_ cloudia added octavian is important! _

**octavian is important** THERE’S A PROPHECY

**octavian is important** yes i know im supposed to be at the baths the others are still in the orgy including jason but i got a vision and i just sliced open like five fucking teddy bears and IT SAID THAT THE PROPHECY IS ONGOING

**octavian is important** THAT ONE THE ONE THAT GOES TRAVEL FAR CHILD OF DEATH OR ELSE WE WILL STEAL YOUR BREATH

**cloudia** ORGY??

**reynaara** that one???

**reynaara** aight emergency senate meeting in three hours

**reynaara** gotta take care of Hilaritas first

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> people: you can't possibly make a chatfic ANGSTY!  
> me: how bout i do it anyway?


End file.
